It finally happened. I couldn’t put it off any longer. Yesterday, I ordered my first pair of reading glasses. It’s a clear signal. I’m getting older. When I handed the Optician my prescription, she congratulated me.
It caught me off guard. Is she congratulating me for getting old?
We then went through the process of picking out frames. I enjoyed trying on glasses. I found a pair that made me look good. If not good, at least smarter.
By the time I left the store, I felt good about getting my first pair of glasses.
This optician guided me on a process of bringing me from dejected to happy.
Of course, as a student of persuasion, I had to know. How did she do it?
The Amateur Mindset
I always approach a learning situation with the mindset of an amateur. I’m open to all ideas from those who know more than I do.
The woman who helped me has been dealing with people like me for thirty-two years.
She goes through a similar routine with all first-time adults. She has similar routines for other scenarios.
For people like me, getting your first pair of reading glasses can be a bit emotional. It’s a sign you’re aging.
Turning My Emotions Around
What brought me from distressed to content?
One of the first things we did was look at frames. After a quick evaluation of my face (size and shape) she picked out a few frames.
When I put on my second pair, I smiled.
“Wow. I kind of like these,” I said to her.
agreed. She said it was a perfect look for me. Was she being honest? Was she just flattering me? I don’t know.
What flipped that switch in my head?
Here’s her secret.
It wasn’t her words that turned my emotion around. It was one of the seven deadly sins.
Seeing myself in the mirror with a cool pair of glasses reversed my negative emotion in an instant. This is why we picked out frames before we looked up insurance coverage or went through the technical steps.
With her thirty-two years experience, she knows the power of vanity to reset our emotions. Taken to an extreme, vanity impaires our decision making. That leads to unpleasant side effects.
That natural pride in our appearance, in moderate doses, injects some pleasure into our psyche.
Here’s The Tricky Part
Playing to someone’s vanity feels fake. Telling someone they should feel proud of their abilities, appearance or qualities means little. They need to come to that conclusion on their own
How did the optician do it? Simple. A demonstration. I put on the glasses and looked in the mirror. That’s all it took. She didn’t need to say a word.
Persuasion without saying a word. She schooled me.
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